


It's okay, you're safe

by lexaownsme (BiancaFairchild)



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Car Accidents, Crying, Domestic Fluff, Endgame Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Ex-Military Lexa, Ex-military clarke, F/F, Fluff, Hospital, Military Backstory, My First Fanfic, Octavia Blake & Clarke Griffin & Raven Reyes are Best Friends, Sad Clarke, clexa angst, clexa fluff, clexa has a daughter!, clexa will probably have sexa idk, probably smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-01-31 16:32:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18595159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BiancaFairchild/pseuds/lexaownsme
Summary: this is my first fan fic, criticism and advice is welcome.So basically there was a car accident and Clarke waits for Lexa to wake up. Is everything going to be ok?





	1. We met again

Clarke enters the room where Lexa is hospitalized. She couldn't remember many things from the accident, only that she was in the back seat with their daughter, Madi, trying to put her to sleep because she was tired and angry. The 2 year old started to scream and Clarke started to sing to her, hoping that she will calm down. Lexa turned around to give Clarke a tissue to whipe Madi's tears, but in that very moment a bus lost control and pushed their car into an electricity pillar.

      The blonde and the two-year-old got away with just a couple of scratches, but Lexa was smashed by the pillar. The last thing that Clarke remembers is her trying to wake up Lexa and calming down Madi as the ambulance's blue and red lights blurred her vision. Now, she is standing right next to Lexa's hospital bed. She looks so quiet and peaceful. The doctors didn't let her visit Lexa until they were done with all the surgeries. A nurse told Clarke that the brunette has a broken leg, 2 broken ribs, a concussion and that her spine is affected, and that she needs months of exercises for her to walk again. The ribs touched Lexa's internal organs and had a few internal bleedings. It's a miracle that she is alive. The blonde took a chair and pulled it next to the bed. It's been 3 weeks since she hasn't seen her wife.  
She sits down and takes Lexa's hand in hers. "Hi" Clarke says as her voice breaks, tears falling down her cheeks. She takes a deep breath and tries to smile for the love of her life. "I hope that you can hear me. I just..." the blonde stops as her emotions are overwhelming. "Please wake up. I-I love you so so much. Madi loves you too, I told her that you are on one of your missions in Afghanistan. Surprisingly, she doesn't remember the accident because of the shock. Madi is with Octavia and Raven at our apartment, they are doing such a great job at taking care of her, but they are not better than you are, no one is." Clarke pauses as she is looking at her wife. Lexa's breathing is calm and her pulse is normal. She has a bandage on her forehead and a bigger one, wrapped around her chest and stomach to protect her ribs.

Clarke started to tell her stories about Madi and what they have done this week, hoping that she will get a response. Unfortunately, she didn't. Now she understands how scared and terrified Lexa was when they first met. They were both in the army, Clarke working as a doctor on the field and Lexa was a soldier. Lexa got shot in the leg and almost died because she couldn't walk, the terrorists that shot her getting closer and closer. Clarke took her by arm and they both found a place to hide, an old barn. While they were searching for the place, Clarke got shot too in the shoulder. They quickly went into the building and Clarke managed to take care of the brunette's leg in 2 minutes. Lexa didn't notice that Clarke was injured, but when she did, she immediately took action by pulling the bullet out of the blonde's shoulder while carefully listening to Clarke's indications. Because of the blood that she lost, the doctor passed out, Lexa desperately trying to wake her up. The next thing that Clarke saw was the brunette standing next to her hospital base holding her hand, happy tears filling her eyes.  
"Remember when we saved each other lives? I kind of miss the army, it also had good parts like sneaking out after morning training in the medical supply room or remember that time when we played with the drug dogs and they found the weed that you hid in your pocket?" Clarke started to giggle as she remembered her younger self and the bad decisions she kept making."Do you know what's the best decision I have ever made my entire life? Saving you on that field. I will never regret it, never, even tho I got a pretty nasty scar on my shoulder."  
"I want to thank you for bringing Madi in our lives, for being there when I needed someone the most, for never letting me down. I am so grateful for you. Just please come back, I don't know what would happen if I lose you too....first my dad, then my mo-" Clarke started to sob, her voice breaking every time she tried to talk. She kissed her wife's hand and just stood there, waiting for her to wake up and tell her that she's safe, like that day when they saved each other on the field. After an hour of just crying and talking on the phone with Raven to inform her about Lexa's situation, she found the strength to talk again to her wife.  
"I miss your pancakes, I miss you cuddling me while watching Netflix, I miss your soft kisses, I miss you waking me up at 5 am for our morning run and then dragging me out of bed to the bathroom, I miss listening to you telling stories to Madi about princesses that become warriors to save their kingdom, I miss you being in our bed, I miss your smile, I just miss you so much. But I know that you are a fighter and that you are coming home. You will walk again and you will carry Madi on your shoulders again when we are going to the park. We can do this, together." more tears started to fill Clarke's eyes, a shy smile starting to curl up in the corner of her mouth. "It's okay, you're safe" the blonde said as she kissed Lexa's hand again.


	2. I'll always be with you

       For the next week, Clarke would come every day to Lexa's hospital room and would talk to her, rant about the fact that Madi doesn't want to finish her vegetables and about her annoying co-workers or she would just stay there, holding her hand, waiting for a sign that her wife would wake up.

       It was Saturday when she arrived earlier than usual because the visiting hours began sooner and she had the weekend off because she worked during the night at the hospital, not the one Lexa is at. Clarke asked one of her co-workers to take her shift tomorrow, her friend agreed because she knew what the blonde was going thru. Clarke couldn't remember the last time she slept well or ate a full meal. She felt so tired and defeated, it felt like the world around her was shattering with every second that Lexa wasn't there. She misses her body warming her up every night, her playful looks when they were cooking together (they were fighting more than cooking), her strong arms lifting her up to reach the top shelf, everything about her. Now she is cold at night, the blanket never helping her, trying to curl up to find a little bit of heat.

      Mornings are not the best either. She stopped running because she barely sleeps and instead of delicious pancakes or eggs, she rarely eats a piece of bread while preparing Madi milk and cereal, waiting for Raven or Octavia to pick her up, so she can go to work, and when she has night shifts, she would just drink some bitter coffee and watch cartoons on Netflix with their cute daughter. No more fun games or walks in the park. Clarke was trying to be happy and keep it together for Madi, but the little girl would always ask her what is wrong or if she was mad at her. Clarke always had the same answer "I am just a little bit tired, don't worry" and then a forced smile would curb on her lips while trying to not worry her daughter. Every time she looked at Madi, she would see a part of Lexa. Like the big unique green eyes, her strong yet soft personality, the way she raised her eyebrows when curiosity hit her and her dark brown hair. She loves the tiny girl so much, she would die for her. If something happened to Madi, she would've lost her mind, literally.

      Clarke pulls the chair that she is familiar with, the one that she sits every time on. It's not very comfortable, but she doesn't care, all that matters is her wife. She slowly sits down, like she's afraid to brake Lexa. The blonde gently takes the brunette's hand and kisses it like every other day. "I know that you probably can't hear me, but I'll just keep talking. Even tho you can't answer me, you are a great listener, you've always been." Clarke's eyes started to tear up like every time she saw her wife there, in a hospital bed, and not home with her and their daughter." The nurses told me that you will wake up anytime now, that I just need to be patient. And I will wait, as long as it takes you to wake up. There's no rush. I will be here when you decide that you are ready to wake up. I love you." 

     After a while, she started to talk about her day and about the drawings Madi made with their family. The little girl also added Raven and Octavia in the background. Their daughter proudly attached it on the fridge and she said that her mommies are the best. Clarke started to laugh at the memories of the two-year-old and her silly drawings. She somehow had Clarke's passion, art.

     Suddenly, Lexa's pulse grew worryingly. Panicked, Clarke called a nurse to check on her wife's situation. The nurse quickly stabilized Lexa and told Clarke that this type of stuff happens from time to time, but it's nothing she should be worrying about. Clarke was so scared. That sentence "there's nothing that you should worry about" scared her. She is a doctor and she knows that that sentence means that something's not right, or she's just kind of a paranoid person. 

     She wanted to go outside to get some fresh air and a cup of coffee, but as she left the room she heard a familiar voice, Lexa "Clarke?". The blonde turned around as she felt her heart going crazy. Happy tears started to fall down her cheeks as she ran towards her wife who had a shy smile in the corner of her mouth."You are awake!" Clarke said as her voice broke into more tears. She gently kissed her wife's forehead and smiled widely as their eyes met. 

     "What happened, where's Madi? Are you ok?" Lexa asked with a worried look as she placed her hand on Clarke's cheek. The blonde placed a kiss on Lexa's hand and started to sob as she cupped Lexa's face into her arms. "I feel so much better, now that you are awake. Madi is with Octavia and Raven at the mall. She misses you." "I don' understand-" "Shhhh.." Clarke interrupted her "It's ok, I'll tell you everything".

      Clarke sat on the chair and took her wife's hand, looked into her eyes and talked her thru the accident and all that happened in the past month. Lexa started to cry as she tried to sit up, an excruciating pain filling her chest and stomach. "Careful," the blonde says as she puts Lexa on her back rearranging her pillow, "We are going to get thru this, together, ok?". Lexa's eyes filled with tears and nodded as Clarke gently hugged her. After Lexa calmed down, Clarke realized that she had to tell the nurse the big news. Even tho she felt guilty leaving Lexa alone, even for a few minutes, she still had to announce the nurse and tell Lexa that she can't walk. It broke her heart that she had to tell that to her soulmate. Moving means everything to Lexa.

* * *

 

     She watched Clarke leaving to get the nurse. When did this all happen? Why her? She felt like the world was spinning around her like the weight of all of the things that just happened is gonna shatter her into a million pieces. She is so happy to see Clarke, but she feels so guilty. She should've been more careful while driving, she could've avoided all of this. She felt so guilty to leave Clarke and Madi alone. When Madi was only 8 months, she had a mission in Afghanistan that she had to attend. She only got 7 months of maternal vacation, so she started to work when Madi was very young. Lexa left for 3 months and missed so many things: the first steps, first words and her first time she went by herself on the slide. Clarke filmed everything and showed the clips to Lexa, but the brunette wished that she was there, she felt guilty for not being there.

* * *

 

     Clarke entered the room with the nurse with a worried look on her face. As the woman was examining Lexa, the brunette asked if something was wrong. The nurse paused and looked at Clarke. The blonde nodded, she knew that Clarke had to tell Lexa the bad news. Her wife looked concerned at her waiting for a response. "Your spine is affected too." 

      Confused, Lexa quietly waited for more explanations. Clarke looked at the nurse, silently begging for her to give the brunette the news, the blonde feeling too overwhelmed to say anything at all."Ma'am, there's a chance that you might never be able to walk again, but there is a 60% chance that you will, with a lot of therapy and time". Lexa's vision blurred and the nurse's voice started to fade. She felt like the world slipped from under her bed. Clarke took her wife's hand and looked into her green eyes as she tried to comfort her. 

     "I am going to leave you alone." the nurse said as she left the room and closed the door. Lexa started to loudly cry as she sat up and hugged Clarke despite the pain that she felt. Clarke hugged her back, trying to not touch her ribs that were still healing."I'll always be with you, don't you ever doubt that" the blonde whispered as she parted from the hug. Lexa looked into her wife's beautiful blue eyes and then at her lips. The brunette softly kissed her wife as Clarke gently kissed her back. She missed Lexa's lips, but as much as she wished to kiss them forever, she had to put Lexa back on her pillow before she brakes another rib or something. A sad smile curbed on Lexa's lips as she sat on her back. "Do you want me to stay overnight"? I have a friend that works here and she'll maybe bring another bed." "Please..." Lexa said as her sad smile turned into a happy one.

      After a while, Clarke turned with another bed and her friend helping her to push it."Thank you so much, I owe you a drink." "No problem, but only tonight. Ok? My boss is gonna kill me if she finds out." "Ok, thanks again. Bye" "See you around". Clarke smiled at her friend and then turned around to arrange the bed. Lexa excitingly smiled as her eyes were filled with joy. It was 4 pm so they had plenty of time to talk and catch up. 

      After half an hour, a couple of doctors arrived to check on Lexa and her friend nurse brought food for both of them. Lexa and Clarke started to talk about the time they cooked pasta for the first time together and dropped all the tomato sauce on the kitchen's carpet and how they spent hours trying to wash off the red stain. They continued to talk until 6 pm when Lexa started to feel dizzy. She was tired. Clarke let Lexa rest and went outside to call Raven and Octavia and announce them the good news and to ask them to take care of Madi overnight and to get some coffee.

      It was around 9 pm when Clarke went back inside. Lexa was still sleeping. She slowly entered the room, took off her shoes and climbed on the extra bed. Lexa opened her eyes and smiled at the sight of Clarke. Their fingers tangled into each other and they both fell asleep with a smile on their face. Clarke finally slept well. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys so much for reading!  
> criticism and advice are welcome  
> ly!


	3. City of happiness

    Days pass by as Clarke visited her soulmate daily. She brought the brunette flowers, her favourite food and went on walks with her. Lexa didn't like her wheelchair, she felt traped, vulnerable. 

    Clarke didn't know what to do to make Lexa feel more comfortable, but she knew how to make her smile. She'd record Madi saying how much she loves moma Lex, a nickname that the little girl gave the brunette. The recordings always filled Lexa's eyes with joy and sometimes sadness, because she wasn't there. That fucking bus or whatever that was....she should've been more careful, she could've avoided all of this. The weight of the guilt and the pain pressed down Lexa's shoulders as she tried her best to be happy for Clarke. She smiled because she knew that Clarke still loved her.

     The blonde's stomach filled with butterflies every time she saw that smile, that damn smile. The one she fell in love with. The smile that could light up the darkest room. Clarke would always bring Lexa ice cream or something sweet before she'd push her wheelchair down the hospital's hallways. She loved to spoil her wife.

     Every day Lexa got better and stronger. Her ribs healed very quickly as well as her leg. But she couldn't move by herself. It broke Clarke's heart seeing her wife in that condition.But she smiled for her, for Madi, for them. She wanted to make sure that Lexa was happy. She was happy as long as her wife was.

     After two months of Clarke lying to Madi that Lexa was on a mission and that she was leaving so much because she had a lot of people to help, moma Lex was coming home. An employee was belping Clarke bring the bags with Lexa's clothes to the car, as the blonde pushed the wheelchair, smiling widely at the thought of Madi's face when she's gonna see her mommies home. 

    Lexa felt really  ~~scared~~ excited, but not a good excited. Yeah, she was really happy to see her daughter again, but on the other hand she feels like Madi hates her for leaving. She dosen't understand why she feels this way. Clarke and the employee helped Lexa get into the car and the man showed Clarke how to fold the wheelchair, so she can put it in the back of the car.

     The blonde entered the front seat, where the wheel was placed. A wide smile was on her face, but as she looked at Lexa, it faded. The brunette had a sad smile curling up in the corner of her mouth, almsost superficial. "Baby, what's wrong? Are you ok?" Clarrke asked as she reached for Lexa's hand, trying to comfort her. Lexa's smile widened, trying to convince her wife that she was fine, when she wasn't. "I am ok. I just have a lot on my mind right now. Don't worry."

   Clarke knew that something was wrong, but she trusted her wife, so she didn't think much of it. She kissed Lexa's hand and held it most of the road. The whole road Clarke couldn't stop giiggling and smiling, making Lexa smile and giggle too. Her wife was such a dork. The dork she fell in love with...

  They arrive at their tiny house. It's a beautiful home near the big city. Its windows are big and shiny, the front small porch looks very friendly, with a coffee table and 2 tiny chairs placed by it. The kind of tall grass was Madi's favourite place to play wiht her moms. Under the big shadow of an old oak tree was standing Raven and the tiny toddler. It was a hot summer evening, so the little girl was wearing a dress, barefoot on the kind of itchy grass, but soft and comfortable. Clarke parked in front of the house waving to Raven and Madi.

   Excitement filled the little girl's eyes as she was pointing at the car and screaming "Moma Lex! Mommy is here!". Lexa's eyes filled with tears of joy. The blonde immediately got out of the car and unfolded Lexa's wheelchair. Raven smiled widely as she saw Lexa and helped her get in the wheelchair. "Woods is here! Long time no see, pretty." the latina hugged the brunette. "Hi Raven, I missed you too!"

   Madi was confused when she saw Lexa in that wheelchair. The toddler ran towards Clarke and hugged her leg. The blonde picked her up and kissed her forehead "Hi baby girl, you missed me and moma Lex?". The kid nodded and then leaned towards Lexa "Up moma Lex!". Clarke placed Madi in Lexa's arms. The tiny girl hugged moma Lex and then kissed her cheek. The mom hugged her kid tight, kissing her tiny head that smelled like strawberries."I missed you so much, kid. I love you, you know that. Right?". 

   The toddler started to giggle as she parted from the hug " I wov you too!" Madi said as she placed her tiny hands on Lexa's cheeks and pressed a kiss on her mommie's nose. Lexa started to laugh as tears of joy were falling down her cheeks.

   Clarke and Raven were watching them lovingly. "Let's enter the house." the brunette said as she looked towards Clarrke with a sugestive look, reminding the blonde that she had to push her wheelchair because she was having her hands occupied with Madi. Raven took the bags from the car and followed the family that she was also part of, kinda.

   They entered their house, a well known smell filling the air. "You made pasta? Oh my god, I love you, Clarke!" Lexa exclaimed as she looked around, smiling. The living room was a modest, with a homie vibe. They had a big black coutch in the middle of it, a giant flat tv screen placed in front of it, a white carpet on the floor and a beautiful tiny coffe table placed on it. Madi's toys and clothes were all over the place. The kitchen was on the left. It wasn't big, or too small. It was just right for the three of them. Four, if we add Raven, who was coming at least 3 times a week to have dinner with them and take care of Madi when they were at work. Raven had a job as a bartender and only had night shifts and rarely worked during the day, so she was able to look after the toddler when no one could.

     Clarke unpacked Lexa's bag and Raven started to arrange the table for dinner. Lexa went in the living room to spend time with her daughter. "What this?" Madi asked, her big green eyes filled with curiosity, as she pointed towards the wheelcnair Lexa was sitting on."Mommy hurt her legs when she was at work and now I have this wheelchair to move. Don't worry, I will be ok very soon." the mom answered as she placed the little girl in her lap."But we will go play?" "Of course, baby girl, anytime". The toddler started to smile as she got off Lexa's lap. She then picked up a book that was sitting on the couch and said "Story! Story!". Lexa couldn't resist those eyes and took the book from the tiny hands, placed Madi on the couch and started to read her favourite story, Mulan.

   Clarke was watching them, a smile starting to curl up in the corner of her mouth. She was lening against the wall, listening to the way Lexa was reading. The brunette had a calming, soft voice, sometimes goofing around with noises to make the toddler giggle. 

   Madi's eyes started to slowly shut as she curled up against her favourite blanket. Lexa smiled and placed a kiss on the little girl's forehead. "I couldn't convince her to sleep after she ate her soup. She was too excited to see you, so we waited outside like she demanded. That little girl is stubborn, just like you, blondie" Raven whispered as she was standing next to Clarke. Lexa smiled at the sight of her wife watching them, making her blush a little bit. Lexa took the little girl in her arms and gave her to Clarke, so she can put Madi in her bed, upstairs. Clarke just now realised that Lexa couldn't go to the tiny girl's room. At least their bedroom was downstairs.

   After Clarke placed Madi in her room, Raven and the married ckuple started to eat the famous past that the blonde made. "Even to this day I still don't understand how you make these so good, honey." Lexa chuckled as she was eating. "Just a little bit of love" Clarke smiled.

   The evening slowly passed away as the couple was cuddling on the couch, watching a movie they randomly picked up from Netflix. Raven left as she as she finished eating, she had to go to work. Madi was still sleeping, probably too tired after a whole day spent outside.

   "She still loves me, right?" Lexa asked as she came closer to Clarke. "Of course;! Did you ses her face when she saw you? If God came to earth,she wouldn't be as half as excited when she was today... Is um.. Is everything alright, Lexa?" The brunette inhaled deeply before she started talking " If I paied more attention while driving, I would've been there for her. I can't keep leaving you guys alone! I-" Clarke interrupted Lexa with a shush. "Hey, look at me." 

   Their eyes met, Lexa's eyes filled with tears, Clarke's filled with concern. "We love you so much. It was no one's fault, okay? You are my world and you make us so happy. Don't you dare bring yourself down like that. You are amazing, I love you and I-" Lexa kissed Clarke so deeply, the blonde needed to have some air before kissing Lexa back. They fell asleep in eachothers arms, like that night at the hospital when they met again. But now the aren't in a boring hospital room, they are in their home, their city of happiness.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I am so so sorry for not updating the story in time! But as Alycia would say there's a reaassooon. I had many tests and exams and I also had to drag my grades from hell.  
> Hope you enjoy this new chapter! Let me know in the comments what you think and if I can improve something! Have a nice day! <3


End file.
